Suicide or murder?

It is widely recommended that cyclists wear glasses. This is for a variety of reasons. Protection from the sun is the obvious one but also to prevent dust and insects from blinding you when you are careering down a hill at 30+mph. Now that I am spending a lot of time in the saddle I can see why they are important. However, that does not prevent me managing to eat a constant supply of wildlife.

I try to keep my mouth closed as much as I can but that is not always possible when I am struggling up a hill. So now I have come to the conclusion that Britain’s flies are all suicidal. They all have the whole countryside to fly merrily around in, so why do they all aim for my mouth? It can only be that they are doing it on purpose and want to end their meagre lives in the warm comfort of my throat. Or is it something more sinister?

Are they all on a mission to bring me down? Sacrifice themselves for the greater good. One way or another I am overdosing on my protein intake. When I get home I should be hungry but feel like I have just eaten a three course meal. And how unpleasant must it look to passing motorists to see me spitting onto the grass verge?

I have no problem with any form of wildlife and am happy for them all to live their lives how they wish as long as it doesn’t endanger mine. I am now starting to feel that I’m solely responsible for endangering the future of what was a very common species of insect.

Simon